D/S dynamic outside the bedroom

Doesn’t it feel thrilling when you fuck your partner into submission or when they are the dominant one who bosses you around? Dom and sub dynamic brings out people’s wild nature and spices up hardcore sessions. However, some choose to implement this D/S dynamic into their entire relationship, not just in sex. That is called a dom/sub relationship.

How does a D/S relationship work?

Typically, the D/S dynamic is reserved for the bedroom and for BDSM sex scenes. However, it can also extend to include the rest of the relationship. A D/S relationship means that people in it have dominant and submissive roles, and they behave according to those roles in all aspects of their relation.

Practicing the D/S dynamic outside the bedroom can make the relationship more exciting. Also, it can build up sexual tension during daily activities, which can result in the most intense fucking at night. There are more significant benefits of this type of relationship. The dominant person can help the submissive one get rid of some bad habits or make some healthy changes that would improve their life by setting up rules (with the sub’s consent).

d/s dynamic
Naughty sub got spanked

Giving away the control

It is possible to practice the D/S dynamic all the time or only periodically.

The 24/7 dom/sub relationships, also known as total power exchange (TPE), are challenging. They are a lifestyle. The sub obeys their master in every aspect of life – from what they wear and eat to what they do in their free time and how they spend money. And the control can go as far as having to ask for permission to use the bathroom.

When the sub gives away all the control, it also means that the dom/me is entirely responsible for the sub’s well-being. The master has to ensure that the sub eats healthy, gets enough sleep, completes work/school chores, and gets enough orgasms. After all, people practice power exchange because it makes them happy.

And the couple also stays in their roles even when they are in public. As for the rules, the master can set all of them, or the couple can make them together. Either way, this type of D/S dynamic is highly demanding and is not for everyone.

On the other hand, a couple can decide to make their relationship D/S only for some time or only at home. This casual approach is also not limited to the bedroom – it can include all the rules that apply to TPE – but it allows the couple to leave their roles more frequently.

Consent is everything

It is vital to highlight that the D/S relationship is a relationship between two consensual adults who both agree on the terms. BDSM or D/S dynamic are not abuse. For people outside of the relationship, it might seem like something is off when they see bruises on the sub, or when they see the dom/me bossing their partners around. However, that has nothing to do with the situation inside. Perhaps the sub enjoys pain, and the risk of getting bruised during a BDSM play is realistic. The couple’s agreement might include some rules for general behavior that they practice even in public.

The important thing is that nothing happens without the submissive partner’s consent. Even though being submissive implies giving up the power, they have just as much control as their master has. That is because the sub usually sets the boundaries. They also have a safe word that can stop the play, and the dom/me must respect that.

The couple discusses all of that before starting a D/S relationship. Communication, long and honest talks are necessary for this type of relationship. Sometimes, the couple even decides to make a contract. It can contain as much as or little details, and it prevents many misunderstandings and unpleasant or hurtful situations. 

BDSM dynamic
A dominatrix punishing a disobedient slave

How does D/S dynamic look like?

When the D/S dynamic spreads to the whole relationship, it’s not all about sex. So, how to practice non-sexual D/S and BDSM dynamic?

As I’ve mentioned, the master can set the rules about everyday habits. Plus, they can give their sub/slave various tasks. The task can be something practical, like doing the dishes, giving the dom/me a foot massage, or something ridiculous or humiliating, like doing everything with one hand tied at the back. It can also be something that helps the sub. For example, the dom/me can order the sub to quit smoking or to read a few pages of a book every day.

And if the sub fails, the master can punish them. That punishment can be physical, sexual, or it can consist of an even harder task. BDSM elements can be included, such as impact play and bondage. But D/S dynamic can work even without BDSM elements.

When power exchange includes everyday tasks and habits, that is a non-sexual D/S dynamic. Of course, the couple can practice the power exchange in bed as well.

Is D/S dynamic your kink?

If you have a natural need to dominate/be submissive, then the D/S relationship might suit you well. You can try it even if you are not a natural but think it will be fun. But before you venture into the world of power exchange, think about what exactly you want and what and your limits; talk about it with your partner, and don’t forget about consent. Then you can go wild with domination, punishment, whips, or whatever else you desire.